Coates Frey Tanimoto & Gibson, AAL, LLLC Divorce . Paternity . Custody . Abuse/TRO . Mediation . All Family Law
Call For A Free Initial Consultation 808-524-4854

We ‘Wrote The Book’ On Divorce In Hawaii

How to help your child through a divorce

All children handle their parents' divorce differently. A child will handle changes in their life in a certain way depending on their age, level of attachment, maturity and personality. While some children could be severely affected by their parents' divorce, others will carry on with daily life as though nothing changed.

You should always make time to sit down with your child and explain to them the changes that are going to occur. If you have multiple children, you may want to have separate conversations with each of them so it is possible to tailor your explanation to their age and to address the individual concerns that they have. The following are some other ways that you can help your child through a divorce, regardless of their age.

Keep the complexities of the divorce away from your children

Regardless of whether your child is 18 months or 18 years, they should not be exposed to the complex aspects of divorce. If you and your divorcing spouse are arguing about the property division or child custody, have these conversations in an environment away from your children. Similarly, you should not deprecate your divorcing spouse in front of your child. No matter what they have done, they are still your child's other parent, and speaking negatively about them will only create a conflict in your child's mind.

Keep your child's routine stable

In your child's life, things should be "business as usual" throughout the divorce process. If your child goes to soccer practice each week, for example, make sure that this continues, even if you are feeling overwhelmed by the divorce. Maintaining structure in your child's life can help them emotionally.

Encourage honesty

Your children should know that there is no question that they cannot or should not ask. You may want to make time for your child to ask questions in a safe environment, for example, in a weekly family meeting. Make sure that all issues can be spoken about and that nothing feels like a taboo subject.

Going through a divorce can be a challenging time for any family. Do what is right for your children by not being afraid to ask for support.

No Comments

Leave a comment
Comment Information
Email us for a Response

Get A Free Consultation

Bold labels are required.

Contact Information
disclaimer.

The use of the Internet or this form for communication with the firm or any individual member of the firm does not establish an attorney-client relationship. Confidential or time-sensitive information should not be sent through this form.

close

Privacy Policy

Coates Frey Tanimoto & Gibson, AAL, LLLC
900 Fort Street
Pioneer Plaza Suite 1400
Honolulu, Hawaii 96813

Phone: 808-524-4854
Fax: 808-524-0717
Honolulu Law Office Map

Image Office Map
Image Office Building