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What Happens If We Can’t Make Decisions About Our Children?

On Behalf of | Apr 7, 2022 | Child Custody, Family Law

If parents are granted joint legal custody, they must make major decisions about their children’s lives together. If both parents are unable to agree on a major decision, they may need to attend mediation to create a solution or have a stipulation in their custody agreement regarding how to settle decision-making.

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In a world where parents often have to share custody of their children, it’s important to learn how to work together for the sake of your kids. Mediation can be a helpful tool in settling disputes and coming to an agreement that works for both parties. Here are some tips on how to make mediation work for you and your co-parent.

1. Communicate openly and honestly with each other.

It can be difficult to communicate with your co-parent, especially if you have a lot of disagreements. However, it is important to try to be civil and work together for the sake of your children. Here are some tips on how to communicate with your co-parent in a healthy way:

  • Avoid talking about controversial topics. If you can’t seem to agree on anything, it’s best to avoid discussing controversial topics. Stick to talking about practical matters like parenting schedules and child-rearing decisions.
  • Don’t use your children as pawns. It’s important to remember that your children are not bargaining chips in your relationship with your co-parent. Using them as such will only damage their relationship with both of you.
  • Keep the lines of communication open. It’s important to be able to talk to your co-parent about anything, both good and bad. If you’re not able to communicate effectively, it will only make things more difficult for everyone involved.

Communication is crucial in any relationship, but especially important when you’re trying to parent together. Be clear about what you expect from each other, and don’t hesitate to ask questions if there’s something you’re unsure about.

2. Be respectful of each other’s time and resources.

It’s important to remember that both of you are busy people with your own lives. Try to be understanding if one parent can’t make it to every soccer game or school play.

3. Touch base with your co-parent regularly.

It’s easy for miscommunication to happen when you’re not living in the same house. Make sure you’re both on the same page by checking in with each other regularly. This can help avoid misunderstandings and conflict down the road.

4. Be willing to compromise.

Parenting is a team effort, and that means being willing to meet in the middle on important decisions. If you can’t agree on something, try to find a solution that works for both of you.

5. Seek professional help if needed.

Mediation is a great way to resolve disputes, but sometimes it’s not enough. If you find yourselves constantly arguing and not making any progress, it may be time to seek professional help. A therapist or counselor can assist you in communicating more effectively and working through your differences.

What if a decision can’t be reached?

In the event that mediation is unsuccessful or there is no custody agreement in place, the court will likely make the final decision. Not being able to come to an agreement on important decisions can be stressful for both parents and children. It is important to communicate openly with each other and try to find a resolution that works for everyone involved.

‘Ohana is Everything

Parenting is never easy, but it can be made easier by learning how to work together with your co-parent. Mediation can help you resolve disputes and come to an agreement that’s best for everyone involved.

Mediation won’t work in every situation. If you need assistance or support to give your child the best life possible, Coates Frey & Hackett, AAL LLLC is available to help you settle the emotionally charged child custody issues in your case. Call our Honolulu child custody lawyer today to review your case: 808-524-4854